Therapy for the Part of You That’s Never Felt Enough

I’m a gay, neurodivergent therapist in California who helps smart, sensitive gay men & LGBTQ+ individuals/couples build self-worth, reduce anxiety/manage ADHD, and create meaningful relationships. I work especially well with those who feel like “misfit toys” and appear successful on the outside, but are overwhelmed, ashamed, or disconnected underneath. Using a blend of IFS, ACT, and experiential therapy, I offer a grounded, affirming space to untangle what’s not working and find out what is.

Online Therapy for Gay Men in California

Therapy for Gay & Neurodivergent Men Who Feel Stuck in Their Own Head​

​Reduce anxiety, build real self-worth, and create relationships that actually feel fulfilling. 

You think deeply.
You feel deeply.
But that also means anxiety, overthinking, and self-doubt can take over your life.
Maybe you:

• Overanalyze every conversation
• Struggle to feel confident in relationships
• Constantly comparing yourself to others
• Feel like you’re always trying to prove your worth
• Have ADHD and feel overwhelmed by life’s demands
• Crave deeper connection but pull away when things get real

If that sounds familiar, you’re not alone.

I’m Ryan Borland, an openly gay, neurodivergent therapist helping gay men reduce anxiety, build real self-worth, finds skills to manage the overwhelm, and create more fulfilling relationships.
My approach is warm, direct, and grounded in both compassion and accountability.
This is a place where you can finally be understood.
And where real change can begin

Request Appointment

A Gay Therapist Who Understands the LGBTQ+ Experience

Therapy That Is Both Supportive and Honest​

As an openly gay, neurodivergent therapist, I understand the layers that come with navigating identity, relationships, and self-worth in a world that doesn’t always make space for you.
You won’t have to explain the basics here.
But therapy with me won't just be me listening and nodding my head the whole session. It will be collaborative and engaging with an emphasis on creating real movement.
​
My approach is warm, direct, and grounded in compassion. I care deeply about my clients but I also believe growth requires honesty and accountability.
That means I will:

• Support you when things feel overwhelming
• Challenge patterns that keep you stuck
• Help you see yourself more clearly
• Guide you toward changes and hold you accountable when stuck in avoidance

Compassion and accountability go hand in hand here.
You deserve both.
​

Service Pathways

Therapy for Neurodivergent Gay Men

Therapy for Gay Men
Unpack shame, identity pressure, and relationship patterns so you can build authentic confidence.
Learn More

ADHD Therapy for Adults
Understand how your brain works and create systems that reduce overwhelm and procrastination without the use of shame. 
Learn More

​How Therapy with Me Works

Step 1
Schedule a free consultation using the request appointment button 

Step 2
We talk about what’s going on and what you want to change.
​
Step 3
We develop a plan and start the process towards making those changes

My approach focuses on helping you:
Understand the different parts of yourself—especially the ones that feel anxious, self-critical, or overwhelmed
Learn how to respond to your thoughts and emotions instead of feeling controlled by them
Explore how your past experiences and relationships are shaping how you show up today (and how you can change that!)
​
This work helps you understand yourself more deeply, feel more in control of your life, and create lasting change.

Request Appointment

​I provide online therapy for gay men throughout California, including Los Angeles, West Hollywood, San Diego, San Francisco, Palm Springs, Sacramento, and Orange County.

Hi, I'm Ryan

Meet Ryan Borland, Gay Therapist in California

Hi, I’m Ryan
I’m an openly gay, neurodivergent therapist based in California.
I created my practice to help thoughtful, self-aware men who feel stuck in cycles of anxiety, overthinking, ADHD paralysis, and relationship struggles.
Therapy with me is a place where you can be fully yourself and where we do real work that helps your life change outside the therapy room.
​

Read More About Me

Start Online Therapy in California Today

You Don’t Have to Figure This Out Alone​

If you’re feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or disconnected, therapy can help.
I offer a free consultation so we can talk about what’s going on and see if working together feels like the right fit.

Request Appointment

Select the Consultation Appointment when requesting an appointment

(949) 441-2290
[email protected]
Evening & Weekend Appointments Available
Telehealth appointments are conducted using a HIPAA compliant platform